Us.

 

Me and my boo...This was taken one night at a birthday party...We were dancing and decided to photograph this very passionate moment...

The Weekend..

So sad that it is Monday, but glad that I have time to reflect on the weekend here at my job...

on Saturday my little brother Stephen, who is staying with my grandma down in La Mirada, came to spend the day with me and Mark in Los Angeles. I was so excited because I have ridiculous amounts of pride for Los Angeles, and I was so excited to kind of "show off" this city to him...He is such a little country mouse, and has no idea how awesome LA is! Mark and I put a lot of effort into entertaining people. Mark gives people such amazing attention when he is entertaining. He is so good at taking care of people! We planned on going to Beverly Hills and Rodeo Drive to start, which is pretty much my favorite part of Los Angeles, and then get dinner somewhere fun and maybe see a movie since its LA after all, and movies are a big deal here! We also had to pick up a jacket for Mark at Brioni, so we were killing two birds with one stone!

So we spent a few hours in Beverly Hills...Stephen was pretty much far from amused and I was so disappointed! I thought he would be dazzled by all of the glitz and glamour...I even saw Rachel freaking ZOE! That was another tragedy because I was walking with my boyfriend and my brother when I saw her standing before me and neither of them had even heard of her, and I was left alone to celebrate by myself. Nothing is worse than being able to share an exciting moment with someone! Mark really tried, but my brother was there so he had to play down his enthusiasm to protect his manhood.

Anyways, we stopped at Brioni and picked up a fabulous new jacket for Mark...I will have to post pictures sometime. I love going to Brioni. It truly is the finest place to go for menswear. Everything is handcrafted and handstitched in Italy. I don't normally see any women's clothes that I like there, but I was mesmerized with a particular jacket that I found...It was Chinchilla Fur! It was a deep beautiful wintery green, and it was the softest fur I've ever laid my hands on! I was simply astounded. I tried to find a picture of it online, but its not there...Ahh and i just saw a picture of a Chinchilla! They are such adorable creatures I'm not sure I could wear such a thing...But I guess it is already dead...

After Brioni, we headed back to Santa Monica to drop off Mark's clothes and then headed to Universal City to see a movie. We ended up not seeing a movie but going out to eat instead and just talked for the rest of the evening.

I really enjoy my younger brother. He is so insightful and bright. He is extremely easy going and yet very passionate about his beliefs and direction in life. He is the type of person who is just nice to have around because he only adds positive energy and happiness to any situation. He is so kind and loving. He has always been labeled as the "Golden Child" because of how good he is! Mark and him get along really well because they both are interested in computers and science and enjoy talking about those nerdy subjects.

I really hope Stephen gets into a Medical School out here and decides to go to school in LA! I would be so incredibly pleased to have him here. I really think my grandparents would also, because they live in Orange County and I don't get to see them often...

mom.

Almost a year ago, my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer. My mother, the person of whom I am a smaller, more fiery version, was suddenly infected with the worst most despicable disease...and it wasn't even a consequence of any irresponsible behavior! She never smoked a day in her life, but apparently you can still get lung cancer! Who knew.

Before the diagnosis, she was fairly without symptoms. In October of 2010, she went to the doctor to identify the cause of back pain she was experiencing. She thought she pulled a muscle.

Learning this news was just really traumatic, and changed my life. For the first few weeks I would just wake up every day wishing it was all a nightmare. I became extremely withdrawn from most of my relationships and clung to those who mattered most to me...My family, my boyfriend, and my friend who's father died of cancer when she was in college...I didn't want to talk to anyone besides them...I didn't want anyone to act like they knew how I felt or tell me that they were sorry...even though that sounds selfish and rude, it was just such an intimately painful and frightening time, I didn't know how to deal with other people. Really only now after all this time is the first time I feel like I can write about some of those feelings and details.

So...Unfortunately, her lung was in really bad shape, but there was good news in that the cancer did not spread to anywhere else in her body. The cancer was advanced to a point that the option to remove the section of her lung containing the cancer was out of the question...But at least it was isolated within the lung.

The initial shock of the news was horrible, but she immediately began chemo-therapy and actually responded phenomenally. She went in every few weeks and the cancer shrank every time. All of her hair fell out, and she bought a wig. Her first chemo session went really well, and now she is in kind of a maintenance stage where she is still

I think all of us went through a phase where the news was so good each time she returned from the doctors that our concern for her health dropped, and our family kind of went back and acted like everything is okay...But it's not.

The scary thing is that there is no cure. There is no way to eliminate all of her cancer...Its just not possible right now. But there are miracles, and there is science, and I just hope that there is lots of time. I pray that she has enough time to be around for when the cure actually exists. If she could just hold out until then, then everything will be fine.

My mom has been so amazing this year dealing with this. And I'm not just saying that because she is my mom. She has not complained one time. She has not felt sorry for herself, her only concern is her family. It breaks her heart to lack the energy she used to have to serve her family in the way she used to serve us. That is really the only emotional reaction I have been able to notice. It is often apparent that she is in pain, but when I ask her if she is okay, she says that she is fine. She feels so guilty and frustrated, feeling like she has gone from being a servant to being the one who requires service. She feels like she is now a burden.

Although I am sympathetic to her frustrations, nothing could be further from the truth. My mom has been such an ideal patient, and we are beyond thrilled to provide her the little service that we can compared to how she has endlessly waited upon us. Thinking of this makes me cry every time because I realize how loving and selfless she is.

Anyways...those are some thoughts on my mom...

Trip to the East Coast

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Reminiscent

I was looking through French Connection's dresses this morning, and I am so in love with this pink silk dress! I am often drawn to dresses that are vintage inspired, because I absolutely love the A-line...These dresses just epitomize femininity to me, and they fit the female body so well! Also, there is something really wholesome about A-line dresses, something pure and sweet. I love that.

One of my favorite Audrey Hepburn moments is when she won her Oscar for Roman Holiday. The dress she wore during that moment, is pictured above, and was designed by Givenchy. This dress just captures why I love Audrey Hepburn. She has an incredible figure, (although she was painfully thin), and the dress just fits her so beautifully. It was incredibly delicate and complimented her graceful nature perfectly. Audrey Hepburn was not only graceful in the way she walked and moved, but her entire being was graceful. Her speech and attitude towards her accomplishment was just so elegant, and humble. And the dress was a perfect match for her consistent style.

Back to my original point, however, I love the other dress pictured, because it reminds me of Audrey's Oscar Award dress. The boat neck, the delicate nature, the A-line...the skirt definitely varies from Audrey's, but its just so sweet.

La La Land! My FIRST PLACE!!

So, to give a little update on my life, I moved to Burbank over the weekend. Apparently, I found out last night that Burbank isn't the "coolest" place to live, but how was I supposed to know? Whatever. I really like where I'll be living. I'm excited to live in Burbank. I'm near a lot of studios...Jay Leno's huge face will be near me(about 2 miles from my townhouse) and that in it of itself is sweet. I'm sharing the townhouse with two women...They are pretty cool, but I have a feeling that I will be living a pretty independent life in this particular living situation...Anyways, since I have my own room, bathroom, and I even have my OWN BALCONY. I've lived here a little over a week now and I've already encountered some interesting things in my hood.

First of all, the lady who owns the townhome is starting to sketch me out a little bit. She's asked me twice if there have been any suspicious people come to the house to look for her...uhh what? And then last night it got worse. She literally told me not to let anyone in the house who was asking for her because she "might not want to see them." All I can think of is...This woman's got to be in some major debt. I didn't ask any questions but it will be interesting to see whether or not anyone shows up at the door. What if its the police? I can't lie to them!

The best part about my new townhouse is that I have a rooftop balcony so I can go up there and either lay in the warm sun, or watch the beautiful Los Angeles sunset. Well make that two best parts: I also live in an amazingly beautiful neighborhood right next to a mountain full of multi million dollar homes, and seeing these homes and this neighborhood is both inspiring and entertaining! I like to go on walks and imagine the lives of those who inhabit these places....

Important lessons learned in los angeles!

The first thing I've learned this weekend is: Republicans actually exist in the state of California...I went to my first "young republicans of Santa Monica" meeting on Saturday. The topic was The Second Amendment, you know, the right to bear arms. In order to emphasize the "arms' part, we went to a free archery lesson to start out our day. So, I also learned how to shoot a bow and arrow. Its actually not that difficult, and it fulfilled my fascination with Legolas from my favorite movie: Lord of the Rings. It requires about a thirty minute prep course, and extreme safety precautions...The instructor actually yelled at me once because I was giggling...I felt like a little school girl when he literally blurted "SETTLE DOWN" towards me in quite a bitter tone!(So embarassing)

Ultimately, the event was very good, and we proceeded to go to lunch afterwards. There was an intelligent discussion led by multiple individuals, and I met two wonderful people from England! So diverse.

So yeah..Republicans do exist in Los Angeles...shocking, I know! There seemed to be a pretty common consensus that their beliefs were kept secret among their peers...Which doesn't surprise me. I'm trying to get more politically involved this year, so it was good to begin with such a positive experience.

I also learned that going to the beach in January is perfectly acceptable. I went yesterday...and I think I even got somewhat of a tan. At least I got my fill of Vitamin D. I'm trying to wrap my mind around the concept of learning how to play beach volleyball. Is it just me or does anyone else have nightmares of playing volleyball in high school? It looks really fun, however, so I may attempt to overcome my fears.

Let's see. I also learned that Five Guys hamburgers have more calories than In-N-Out, but I still like Five Guys burgers a little bit more.

Finally, I learned that I am completely incapable of partaking in the Catholic communion tradition. I know it probably sounds silly, but I seriously cannot handle it. My boyfriend is Catholic so he urged me to attend mass this past weekend. We went to a church in Beverly Hills. I participated in Catholic communion once when I was nine years old, at a Catholic wedding. In response to nerves, I proceeded to drop the wafer on the ground and asked for a new one when the priest angrily responded "Consume it in thy mouth" repeatedly until I consumed the wafer...with its germs and all. Traumatizing, really.

I figured that after 14 years, I'd give it another shot. Nope. This time, I struggled with the wine part. I tried to dip my wafer in the goblet of wine. I guess that's not kosher in Catholicism. After I successfully did the whole cupping of the hands to receive the body of Christ, I headed towards the blood. The alter guy wanted me to actually drink from the goblet, rather than dipping(a common tradition in Protestant communion.) I wanted to dip. He wanted me to sip. Sip vs. Dip. I thought about sipping...but then I thought about the swine flu. I went for the dip, and experienced one of the most awkward moments of my life. The man's face was disgusted as he painfully tried to lift the goblet toward my mouth as I moved my hand toward the goblet with my wafer...all in slow motion. The tensions were rising...He was pressuring me to sip, but I just couldn't do it! I quickly dipped, and ditched. I couldn't even look back to see whether or not he reacted...I just dipped, ditched, and returned to my pew, completely hot and bothered. Totally awkward and completely inappropriate. Lesson learned- I will never take communion at a Catholic church again!